A Little Bit of Sylvia in Me.

Hello Readers!
Today is the day to write about Sylvia Plath. For those of you who do not know who she is, she is an American Poet, who I am obsessed with! Why? Because I believe that there is a little bit of her in me.

Sylvia Plath was married to Ted Hughes, also a poet, and they had two children together. Sylvia suffered from depression, and committed suicide at the age of 30. Her death goes like this: She sealed the kitchen with wet towels and clothes, while her children were in the other rooms. She turned on the gas, and stuff her head in the oven. She died of carbon monoxide poisoning in the kitchen. CRAZY!
However, some believe that she did not INTEND to commit suicide. Hmmm...does that not sound intentional?

Anyway, so it's not her death that makes me feel this connection with Sylvia. Let me explain. I was introduced to Sylvia Plath by a professor at the age of 23. I had read her poem "Daddy". I thought it was great! I loved that she referred to her father as a Vampire and a Nazi (indirectly). So, I continued to read her poetry and one day it JUST HAPPENED! I came across this little quote that changed my life!

"The truth comes to me. The truth loves me." --Sylvia Plath. 
I would like to say, that the first time I read this quote, I realized I was not crazy. If I was it meant that so was Sylvia Plath and I was not alone, and that made me feel ok with being crazy. You see, for many years I felt that my dreams and these intense feelings I felt were truth revealing itself to me; however, when I would share them with others, they would look at me as if I was crazy. They would say "you're just over analyzing everything." I felt it, though. I knew it was truth speaking to me.

As I continued to read more about this belief that Sylvia had about truth, I realized that the feelings I felt    after truth revealed itself to me where also perfectly normal.  I was angry, miserable, and doubtful. It drove me insane to feel this way! I even thought that I was insane. I never understood why I would feel this. I remember discussing this with other people, and they all denied to ever feel that truth spoke to them. So, then I began to think if I was crazy and if it was a bad thing? Did this mean I was mentally ill? OR was this completely normal? Then I would think, "Well, Sylvia can relate to me. What would she say?" I kept going over this in my head for a long time, until one day everything began to become true.

All of my dreams begin to come alive, and my feelings were being confirmed. The truth did come to me, and it did love me because it was helping me recognize what I wouldn't have on my own; however, it also made me incredibly miserable because I was not willing to accept it. I was too young and naive to want to accept truth as a gift. Instead for a long time I considered it a burden. I fought against it, yelled at it, and ran away from it. It took me 5 years to learn to accept it. I am now 28 and barely accepting truth as a gift. I do not believe I am crazy for feeling this, nor do I think I am not. All I know is that Sylvia Plath has taught me that I am not alone, and that truth does come to us. It may not be revealed to us in the same way or the same time, but it comes.

There are a lot more connections between Sylvia and Me; however, I did not want to bore you with all of them in one reading. I've decided to spread them around. So, stay tuned if interested! :-)

If you would like a little bit of background on her just click on this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sylvia_Plath.

I hope you guys have found this piece entertaining. If you have any questions, please ask. If you have any comments, please comment away!

-Denise

P.S. It's freaken HOT in my side of Cali today!

The Origin of Silensfilia

Hello Readers,
First and foremost, I hope you are all having an awesome Sunday :) It is a tad cloudy out here in Southern California, but I'm sure that by 10 am it will be nice and shinny. I hope. haha

Now, allow me to share the Origin of SILENSFILIA. Like I mentioned in my previous blog, Silensfilia is two Latin words combined together: silence (Silens) and daughter (filia). I was looking for the word OF in Latin so that it could actually mean Daughter of Silence, but I never looked hard enough. So, it's just daughter silence. haha I created this name when I was 19 years old. I am now 28! YES! it is OLD.

So this is what happened: When I was 19 years old I was quite an odd ball. I spent endless hours in my room learning, reading,  and searching because I wanted to know it ALL, and I mean ALL. During one of my searches I came across this documentary called Into Great Silence by Philip Gröning. When I first saw this documentary I thought it was AMAZING! It is a documentary about the everyday lives of  Carthusian Monks of the Grande Chartreuse, which is in France. Before this documentary could be filmed Gröning had to asks for permission, and the monks told him they needed to think about it, and 16 years later they agreed to do the documentary. Talk about really thinking something through!

I grew this fascination with this documentary, that I watched it everyday! The thing about the Carthusian monks is that they do not speak at all. They go about their everyday lives working and walking amongst each other not saying a word. They are allowed, I believe, it was one hour of one day out of the week to go out and talk with another member. I just couldn't believe how people could not saying anything for days! It was crazy to me, because I talk so much!

So, I became obsessed with this idea of what silence really meant and I began to explore it. I even took a vowel of silence of one month, and the funny thing is that no one even noticed. haha I had spent so many hours alone in a room, that people didn't even realize when I stopped talking. After that, I simply appreciated silence, I love it, and I craved it when there was noise. There's this immense peace when your surrounded by silence, that their is no need to vocalize anything in order to communicate.

So, one day I was creating my new email, and so, I came up with the name Daughter of Silence. However, I didn't  want anyone to know the meaning because for me it was something personal; therefore, I searched the words in Latin. Why Latin? Because at the time I thought it was "cool" and well not many people know Latin. When I noticed that no one has ever thought about that name, it became even more special to me. Hitherto, I have never encounter anyone with my name. That makes me happy, because, like I said, it's personal and it was a time in my life in which I learned A LOT.

I know it's not the coolest story, but everyone always asks "What does Silensfilia mean?" So, I figured I'd answer it for you all just incase. On the plus side, I might have introduced you to a very awesome documentary! :D

Here's what the cover looks like:

Trust me, it is pretty amazing!

I hope you enjoyed this blog! And if you didn't, I hope to make the next one better :D
Hope you all have a lovely Sunday.
-Denise

Welcome to my world!

Hello readers!
My name is Denise, but some of my closest friends call me "Ninis." YOU may call me what you wish. I am a bookworm (SAVE THE BOOKS Peepz!), a romantic, a movie/film LOVER, and a tea maniac! I NEEDZ ma tea! (said in a deep manly voice).  I enjoy spending endless hours at a library reading and smelling books (There's nothing like the smell of old books!) and hope to someday own my own little book store of used and rare books. Ok, you guys get it, I love books. Now, for the other details about my personality: I enjoy dancing, walking, writing stuff that is HORRIBLE, art, taking pictures in a photobooth, exercising and shopping! (I'm a girl, get off my back!). There are some places I can be found when I am not at home: On the floor of a library with books all over me, at the coffee shop, or at the gym.
The point of my blog is to simply share anything and everything that has to do with my world. I will attempt to review books, share about the best local libraries to visit, local artist, food, gym stuff, some of my crazy thoughts. Just pretty much ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. This is the point of a blog, right? So, I hope that you become entertained as I share pieces of Silensfilia's world.
-Denise A.K.A Ninis
PS. Silensfilia means daughter and silence in Latin. Why did I chose this name? Stick around and find out :)